Not this again

Went out with G&V today for the UFC fight. Instead of the previous norm of going to the local bar, we went to one of G's friends' house and watched it there with a group of people.
It was uneventful for the most part. G's friend (I think J?) has a really cute 11 mth old, B, that I got to hold and play with some through the evening and two sweet dogs, D & D. The other people there were from J's wife's side of the family. V was having cramps through the evening and was mostly quiet. G drank and did shots so V drove home.
I still find it odd that even though we always use my car the option of me driving almost never comes up, except on trips out to CA. I can understand in the present circumstances that V gets carsick easily and sometimes feels better being the driver rather than a passenger. But in most other cases I think it boils down to me perpetually being the younger sibling. True, V is a very aggressive driver who feels quite skilled and is known for her backseat advice. But she has only been driving for about 3/4 years compared to my almost 11.
I don't mind not driving, it's just an obvious social reinforcement of my relative position with them.

By the by, doing this initial thing that AM does is kinda random, but I think it could make journal posts read as less whiney so I'm trying it. (I'm aware it's the other stuff I say that's full of complaint, not names. But in this way I hope to avoid appearing like I'm attacking anyone or always grumbling about someone or other in particular.)

So, the pertinent part of the evening (to the title) was the drive home. As so often occurs, far too often, a random conversation leads to G & V saying derogatory or otherwise hurtful things about me in the guise of helpful advice/simple observation.

Tonight's foray was into the world of academics and living arrangements.

It started as remarks upon J's situation living with his wife and son rent free or greatly reduced in a large house and not having to pay for child care thanks to the other family members living in the house as well. J's wife's mother, sister, and brother live there and help care for B. V's sister has a similar arrangement with her husband's family.
V remarks "are we doing something wrong here." To which G suggests they let me move back in to help with the child care thing. Impossible to tell if this is a serious suggestion or not. If maybe not living with them, at one point, G remarks how child care costs would be equivalent to paying my rent costs (but then she'd have no money for food or ehr car, etc). Somehow the conversation gets on to me quiting my job and going back to school full time. I was asking about financial aid stuff, trying to work out in my head if there was possibly a way for me to be able to go to school full time without having to work. The answer to that is, not unsurprisingly, no.

The heart of the matter that upset me was two off handed comments. One, when I was talking about how you're essentially screwed over by living alone, financially. (You end up paying $300 less a month for a larger, nicer apartment if you've another person, was the example.) V tosses off, "Well, I can't think of a single person who could stand to live with you considering the way you live. I mean seriously, not a single person. Not anyone." This is not an unsurprising statement, especially from her, but is excessively harsh. For one, there are people who could stand to live with me the way I live currently, and for two, I would alter how I currently live if I lived with someone else anyhow. Considering that V has shared an apartment for 6 mths and a house for 6 mths with me before, rather uneventfully, she should have first hand knowledge of that fact.
Anyhow, it should be easy to brush off and stupid but it's not and it wasn't said as such.
Do I chalk this up to a combination of hormones and her being excessively tired from not having her usual prego nap?

The other comment that got me was when we were talking about me going to school. I was saying how everyone I talked to at Amazon who also does school says they regularly get only 1 or 2 hours of sleep on a day when they have class. I was saying that I didn't think I could do that. G points out Vanessa did that with the census job and said "It just depends on how much you want it."
Maybe that's a fair thing to say, maybe not. But the judgement behind it is never particularly flattering. Besides, I don't think it's unreasonable of me to balk at 2 hrs of sleep. I did 4/5 hrs all through high school. I know I can subsist on very little sleep, but I also know it screws with you, and when you're predisposed to depression as I am, it's sorta asking for a major onset right there. But beyond that. Truly, the biggest obstacle is the particular job I have. This job has long hours and is immensely physically demanding. It's not the sort of thing you can or should do while in sleep debt. The folks I know at work who do school at the same time are constantly going home early or sick from work. I've already had issues with pain and heat exhaustion (one day the AmCare nurse didn't even want me driving home due to my symptoms) and that's with me at my best - fully rested, fully hydrated. I'm loathe to imagine the sort of pain/heat sickness I could be putting myself in to attempt that job on no sleep.

Anyway, it just irks me how common an occurance this whole thing is. Drive home from an otherwise uneventful or pleasant evening and get torn down by G & V on the way. I don't like myself enough as is. I'm very well aware of my myriad personal failings. I don't need help in the demolition department.
I wish I knew how to recruit for the construction industry.
It's not just G & V though, and basically nothing they say is untrue, just stated in a needlessly harsh manner. (Most of it need not be said at all.)

I'm handling it much better than usual though. Not sure why that is.